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Heavy responsibilities for elder aunt among the Logooli

With Seenge Fonesi. She is the elder grand daughter of Isagi and elder daughter of Amugasya. She is often present in functions involving the family of Amugasya. Pic taken on 18/4/2024. The elder sister soon becomes the elder aunt. It is this “seenge munene” (elder aunt) tag that she is tied to many cultural responsibilities – back home. To her marital family she may appear as any other woman, but she is not so in the eyes of her people. Marriage does not steal her away as it would happen with other daughters of the old man. To her, as days go and the old man and woman of the estate are dependents, she becomes increasingly present.  Her brothers also need her for almost all traditional markings. They are marrying, she needs to welcome the new wife. They are giving birth, she needs to come to midwife or “bless” the new born. They are paying dowry she needs to lead the women delegate. There is a conflict she needs to come for a hearing.  And many others. Traditions does not expect her to
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Start your life


 When someone coined that life started at forty, what were his variables? This could be a person waken up from a youth hood slumber, having deluged his life with unrealistic hopes, halfway to the grave yet determined he could march on happily to leave a legacy. Life starts when you get light- when you cease to be a dependant.
 
Being independent is independent of one’s age. A young boy could live on amicably without a parent’s tutelage whereas grownups could still be in different need of external helps. Emotional development, economical capability, physical and social well being vary in their ranges to individuals and places. The will to do things on one’s own, to own up on the outcomes is what I’d term starting life. It is depressing when the will is limited -When you can’t have your room, a vocation to source from, a parent who still wants you close. 
‘Starting life’ in my era means a transition from school environment to a work environment without a substantial startup from guardians on providences as housing, food, clothing and other social securities. Relationships you had personally built and your own capabilities are applied here in handy. Parents, relatives and family friends are not your making. Here, your first job could be a volunteer one, a small enterprise or a casual hustle of job hunt. It is more of a shot in the dark.
My friend wanted to let a room, equally small like mine that he can afford in estate X. I mention my monthly rent and he goes agape. ‘Your budget will afford you a much smaller, differently finished,’ I advice. We are a year old from campus. We are both volunteers in different organizations.  When we later find one that he is satisfied with he pays deposit and promises to start living in a month later. Deposit and rent altogether is too expensive to afford at once.
This moment weans gentlemen and ladies equally.  You’d find a mattress sprawled on the floor with nothing but a pair of shoes and clothing as the only items. If your mama was not near to lend you an aluminum pan, my friend, it will take you a year of patience and sacrifice to call it your shrine tool. For three months it would be a higher purchase on bed, then a table, a 6kg clean gas cooker, utensils, plastics among other things.
In a pass time moment my friend says how he wanted to brush his teeth only to find he had no cup, jug or plate to scoop some water from the a hundred litre container. Could I not just have turned it to my mouth? We laugh. Yesterday we had a hike together and he happened to buy a pan.  Happy that he would start by warming it on the gas cooker he found out that he had no match box! I could not help but help him in laughing. That is how it happened to me, bro.
Which other life therefore awaits him to start? If he can live by own, having us meet on weekends for chats and hikes, the rest can rhyme with his life. If he bought a second hand duvet that was infested with bedbugs he was wise to fumigate it and tell me to be cautious because ‘my place could walk a bedbug in future.’  
I may think that this is it. But if he gets a fiancée I’d not be doing impromptu visits and jump on the bed as the only seat. I’d be forced to cut my legs. Is it then that his life will begin? I hope not.

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