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Heavy responsibilities for elder aunt among the Logooli

With Seenge Fonesi. She is the elder grand daughter of Isagi and elder daughter of Amugasya. She is often present in functions involving the family of Amugasya. Pic taken on 18/4/2024. The elder sister soon becomes the elder aunt. It is this “seenge munene” (elder aunt) tag that she is tied to many cultural responsibilities – back home. To her marital family she may appear as any other woman, but she is not so in the eyes of her people. Marriage does not steal her away as it would happen with other daughters of the old man. To her, as days go and the old man and woman of the estate are dependents, she becomes increasingly present.  Her brothers also need her for almost all traditional markings. They are marrying, she needs to welcome the new wife. They are giving birth, she needs to come to midwife or “bless” the new born. They are paying dowry she needs to lead the women delegate. There is a conflict she needs to come for a hearing.  And many others. Traditions does not expect her to

In the absence of kinship ties...

Hello Family, here is a case that may make an hair stand on your body if you so appreciate togetherness and family ties. Please give it a thought. 

A dear friend of mine comes from a poor family, I mean alienated in the ways they associate with fellow cousins, uncles, neighbours save the vwifwa side. 

It happens that the father is a drunkard and the mother often mentally disturbed. His elder siblings schooled difficultly and are all out of home while the young ones at the mercy of the non attached parents. 

His younger brother, of now 24 years, fought with a fellow lad and unfortunately the lad died a day after due to head injury. The brother has been a motor cyclist and had earlier married with now a child, living by a rented room. He was arrested and now is in cells. 

The deceased family, in wait for any emissaries, decided to go see a member of the family when no one was coming. And my young friend 'was the sober one' to be addressed. In fact the father was asked to the discussion and he arrived drunk. The middle aged men wanted a hand in burial preparations, not accusatory. 

Such a situation always calls for elders, sober leadership to give hope and guidance. 

His immediate uncles are afraid to step in. He does not know his fathers' cousins. He does not know his immediate kins. He says he has never been told who they are. And of course he had never had the desire to know them. And the maternal side, which he relates well, cannot be actively involved. 

It therefore bothers that individuals, families and societies suffer in the hands of the 'state' because we have in several ways kept us away from one another. 

In my sympathetic view, I think that the imprisoned lad is not the main character in the whole tale but this friend of mine who carries the family stone. As Sisyphus. How can such a family redeem itself? 

I have known the family for 7 years now and I may answer other queries if there are. The friend is a confidant and I share this story to pass a message of kinship importance. May it strengthen us. 

With Thanks. 😓

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